How to Lead Others When You Feel Spiritually Empty
“You yourselves know that these hands of mine have supplied my own needs and the needs of my companions. In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus Himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” — Acts 20:34–35 (NIV)
Let that sink in for a moment.
These words from the Apostle Paul weren’t just part of a sermon. They were his heartfelt farewell to the Ephesian elders, a final message from someone who had poured himself out for the sake of others. He wasn’t spotlighting his own accomplishments or platform. He was reminding his listeners of how he served.
This passage from Acts 20 gives us a rare, intimate glimpse into Paul’s heart, one filled with perseverance. He’s on his way to Jerusalem, knowing that hardship and imprisonment await him. And yet, his parting words aren’t a cry for sympathy or recognition. Nope. They’re a reminder to keep serving. To keep giving. To remember that Jesus Himself said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
Maybe those words hit close to home for you, too.
When Leading Feels Like a Quiet Offering
You don’t need a title to feel the weight of leadership. If you’re someone who encourages others, who makes space for community, who carries burdens no one else sees, guess what? You’re leading.
And while leading can be deeply rewarding, it can also be quietly exhausting.
You might be the one others turn to for prayer, advice, or emotional support. The one who cheers others on. The one who rarely gets asked, “But how are you really doing?”
And if you’re honest, maybe your own dreams or spiritual life have felt…paused. Your creative energy feels depleted, and your heart feels a little tired. You keep showing up. But part of you wonders if anyone notices.
Friend, if that’s you, my heart goes out to you. Really it does. Because after working in ministry over 10 years, I know this feeling all too well. But I also know this: Obedience is never wasted.
Even when no one says thank you. Even when your personal goals feel far away. God sees the seeds you're planting.
Real Leadership is Quiet
There’s a kind of leadership that doesn’t come with applause. It looks like faithfulness in unseen spaces. It looks like showing up when it would be easier to walk away. It looks like creating room for others to be vulnerable, while privately wrestling through your own weariness.
That kind of leadership doesn’t always come with a stage or spotlight. But it’s the kind that leaves lasting fruit.
Because leadership isn’t about being impressive—it’s about being intentional.
4 Ways to Stay Spiritually Filled While Pouring Out
If you’re in a season of pouring out, whether through ministry, creativity, parenting, mentoring, or simply holding space for others, these practices can help you lead from a full well instead of an empty cup.
1. Make Space With God That’s Just for You
You need time with God that’s not tied to performance or productivity. Not for prepping content or planning your next steps. Just you and Him.
Maybe it’s 15 minutes of quiet before the day begins. A walk where you talk to Him aloud. Reading Scripture slowly—without the highlighters or sticky notes—just listening for His voice.
Let God minister to you before you minister to others.
2. Keep a Private Journal for Your Soul
Not everything you write has to be shared. Keep a journal that’s just for you. Write your prayers, your frustrations, your ideas. Let it be a sacred space for your soul to speak freely with God. It doesn’t need to be daily or polished. Just honest.
3. Build Rest Into Your Rhythm
Rest isn’t a reward for getting everything done. It’s part of God’s design.
Sabbath isn’t just about doing nothing—it’s about actively trusting God with what you’ve surrendered. Create rhythms of rest in your week or month. Unplug. Breathe. Step away from your responsibilities, even for a day.
You might take one weekend each month where you commit not to answer messages or produce content. Or create a personal “quiet week” each quarter where your focus shifts to reflection and renewal.
Rest whispers: God, this belongs to You more than it belongs to me.
4. Let Others Pour Into You
It’s easy to assume the role of supporter, encourager, leader. But your heart needs nurturing too.
Listen to sermons that feed your spirit. Subscribe to devotionals that speak life over your season. Reach out to a mentor, a trusted friend, or a spiritual companion and say: “Can you pray for me this week?” It’s not weakness to need others. It’s wisdom.
You May Never See the Full Harvest
We live in a world that measures worth in metrics. Comments. Likes. Follows. Shares. Thankfully, God’s Kingdom doesn’t run on algorithms.
Spiritual impact often happens in whispers:
A friend who didn’t give up because you sent a simple check-in message.
A quiet prayer that softened a heart.
A moment of honesty that helped someone feel seen.
You may never see the full fruit of your faithfulness, but God does. He’s keeping track. He’s honoring your yes, even when it feels small.
From One Faithful Heart to Another
I’ve walked through seasons where my calling felt heavy. Where my own voice felt muted. Where I questioned whether I was still being used. Many times, I’ve wanted to walk away.
And in every one of those moments, God gently reminded me: Stay with Me here.
Friend, your faithfulness in this season, however unseen or uncelebrated it may feel, is shaping lives. It’s Kingdom work. And Kingdom work is never small.
Let’s pray:
Father,
Thank You for calling me to lead, even when I feel unqualified or unseen. Thank You for the beautiful burden of walking with others in this season. When I’m weary, remind me I’m not alone. When I feel invisible, remind me You see every act of service. Help me to rest well, to listen closely, and to keep my heart anchored in You. Let my words and leadership overflow from a well of Your presence. Even when I don’t see the fruit, help me trust that You’re growing it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
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Regina is a writer, homeschooling mom, and owner of a comfort food catering business. A contributor to several publications, she is also an advocate for young adults with developmental disabilities and serves on the Compel Pro volunteer leadership team. Living in Ohio with her family, she designs Squarespace websites for fellow creatives and spends her free time cheering her sons from the sidelines or sipping tea while chatting about God’s goodness with women.
